What is an emotional affair?

Posted by admin on July 24, 2011 under Types of Affairs | Be the First to Comment

An emotional affair is also known as an affair of the heart. It is usually the most difficult to deal with because it does not encompass any physical or sexual contact with the other person involved. This may seem odd because an affair usually is thought as sexual infidelity. In fact emotional cheating occurs when your spouse invests a lot of their affection, energy and time into a secondary relationship.

In other words your partner prefers to spend their time with someone else rather than you. So sometimes this will make you feel like a third wheel. When the two of you are together there is hardly any exchange of words. However when they are in the presence of the other person they can’t and they are excited to be in there presence. Does this sound like your situation? Well if this is then your husband or wife may be in an emotional affair.

Other signs of this type of infidelity includes having intimate correspondence with the external person. This does not necessarily mean face to face but also over the phone or internet. Your lover will try hard to maintain a close personal relationship with this person. It is almost like you are being replaced in every department except sexually (hopefully this is never the case). The emotional cheater will usually begin sharing intimate details about your relationship with this person. They talk about your sex life; short comings and issues in the relationship.

Your cheating partner will actually look to this person as being flawless and as a result they might start to compare you with them. This is usually when the signs of an emotional affair become more prevalent. You may notice your spouse or lover has become more emotionally distant or withdrawn or sex may just be physical. If things develop too far then the affair may move from emotional to physical one.

Friendship and bonds outside of the relationship is normal and healthy and this community does not discourage them. However when theses bonds move from an attraction to an obsession then we are looking at trouble. Is a friendship worth more than the bond between you and your spouse? No, it is does not. This obsession can cause conflict in the relationship. Your lover may not even understand that he or she is having an emotional affair, and that his or her feelings are changing towards you because of this other person. The greatest defense is that they were not physical or they never even kissed. However, how far are they from that point? When your affections and love have shifted from your partner to someone else. It will be only a matter of time.

If you are interested in saving your relationship before it becomes physical we recommend you and your spouse talk it out. Explain to him or her what an emotional affair is and let them know your concerns. Don’t be judgemental or a critical, just be open and honest.

If you would like to get more information about affairs and dealing with them you can